A Strange Male Habit

There must be something about the hormone testosterone that forces males to show off their knowledge. I first noticed this as a teenager while watching TV with my father. Whenever someone on screen toted a weapon, my dad would identify it. “That’s a .45,” he would chime in from the couch. It went way beyond enjoyment – he actually seemed compelled to do this. He would often wake up from a sound sleep to announce, “That’s a semi-automatic.” Then he’d resume his snoring. Naturally, since I was a teenager, I found this habit slightly annoying.

A few years later a friend started dating a musician. As we sat around at her parents’ house watching music videos, he would identify the guitars. I found this, and him, intolerable. Since then I’ve noticed other males doing this identification thing with cars in driveways, trucks on the road and bands on the radio.

Then one day my train-obsessed toddler son pointed to the TV and squeaked, “An Amtrak!” This time I found this habit to be cute, charming and endearing. Not to mention a sign of his genius.

I realized that my attitude toward this particular male-trait depended highly on my attitude toward the particular male. I hated the musician, so I hated the guitar labeling. I adore my son, so I adore the train identifying.

Babies of both genders go through that labeling phase, and when a chubby finger is pointing at an object and a drooling little mouth utters some baby talk all the grownups cheer and applaud. Maybe these males never leave that stage. Maybe they are still longing for cheers and applause. But I still don’t like the musician.